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Thursday, June 16

Goodbye My Love


Yesterday morning while the sun was shining, I held Martin's hand as he took his last breath and slipped quietly into eternity. The heartbreak I feel is far more crippling than I ever imagined, but more powerful still is the happiness from knowing he has finally found peace from his pain, that he's walking with angels, and that we will be together again one day.

'But they that wait upon the lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.' - Isaiah 40:31

Until we meet again, I miss you my sweetheart. 

347 comments:

  1. Oh Emily I am so so sorry you dear girl. This is a post I was praying would not have to be made. My heart goes out to you and your lovely babies. I know you'll continue to be strong for them, and rest easier now that he's in a better place free of pain. I pray for your peace of mind and for Martin.

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  2. So sorry! Prayers of strength and peace during this difficult time.

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  3. Emily I am so so sorry, I don't know what else to say, just sorry, love from Irelandxxx

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  4. I'm so sorry to hear of your loss Emily, praying for you at this time. <3

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  5. My heart goes out to you. May you find comfort in your family and your faith as you move forward from this loss.

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  6. Sending all my love and prayers to you. I hope you feel how strong the Lord's arms are around you and your family right now - and how much we are all here, praying for you too.

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  7. I just want to say I'm so sorry for your loss. I've read your blog for a couple of years but not commented much. I'm thinking of you and your family at this difficult time x

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  8. I am here from Cara's blog. My heart breaks for you. Stay strong. Hugs from across the world.

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  9. You and your family are in my heart and mind. My condolences on the passing of their father, and your lover, partner, husband and friend! X
    www.whiitelist.com

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  10. I am so so sorry. My heart breaks for you and your family. When my dad passed from cancer, my grandmother told my mom to not make any huge big decisions for a year and seemed to be good advice for the whole family. Stay strong beautiful.

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  11. I wish there were words enough to bring you comfort during this terribly painful time. I am so, so sorry for your loss. -A

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  12. I'm so sorry, Emily. My heart breaks for you and the kids. I can't hold back the tears as I think about your great loss. Huge hugs, my dear. Life is so unfair sometimes. I'm at a loss for words. Sending you peace and love as you endure your grief. Martin was an amazing man and you two share an incredible love that few will know in this lifetime. Hugs.

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  13. Blessed are those who have loved, for no matter the pain, the joy gives their souls wings. My heart breaks for you, dear, but I wish you light in this dark hour and peace as you struggle in the days ahead. You are an inspiration at finding the joy in the heartache and treasuring the moment. May you feel the the comfort of your sweetheart's arms each time you hold one of your babes. All my love to you and yours.

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  14. Oh how my heart aches for you and your babies! Prayers and love....❤️

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  15. Emily, I have silently read your blog for longer than I can even remember at this point. I've had moments of jealously, moments of admiration, and moments of excitement seeing your beautiful family in all of the lovely pictures and stories you have posted.

    I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. I'm in tears right now as I type this because I cannot imagine losing my partner. The devastation of the mere thought of it is overwhelming. While I am not much for prayer, your beautiful family is in my thoughts today.

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  16. Im so sorry for you and your family and loved ones. I hope in time you find peace & understanding. Much love to you all.

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  17. Sending hugs and prayers from across the miles.

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  18. I'm so sorry. Sending lots of love xxx

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  19. I am so sorry to hear this incredibly painful news. Take peace knowing he is free from the pain and suffering. I pray for you and your beautiful family. RIP Martin xx

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  20. I'm so so sorry Emily! I am not sure what I can say or do to help ease your pain. Praying for comfort and strength for you and your family. How wonderful of a blessing it is to have an eternal family and perspective. May you be wrapped in love, strength, and comfort through this time.

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  21. So so sorry for your loss Emily xx May the love of your family keep you strong.

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  22. I am so, so sorry for your loss. ♥

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  23. So sorry, sending lots of healing love and light

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  24. May he rest in peace, i am very sorry for your loss.

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  25. I wish I had words. I have a heavy heart for you. Many thoughts and prayers.

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  26. your perspective is inspiring to me, thank you for sharing your story.

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  27. I am so so sorry. If I could trade places with him for you I would.

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  28. I'm so sorry for you Emily. I can't imagine how you must feel. There are no words. Just know that you can do this and I hope you can feel the love pouring in from this world and the next as you navigate forward. Xo

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  29. My heart breaks for you. I've been following your blog for awhile now and every time I read an update my heart breaks a little more. I'm so so sorry for your loss, Emily. Sending you love and strength. <3

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  30. I have followed your blog for years. I think you were pregnant with your third, writing to her love letters. Outlining your dreams for her. To be audience to this...I have no words. It doesn't feel real. Words are meaninless in the face of it all.

    My shirt is wet with tears, as I mourn with you.

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  31. Words cannot express my sympathy to you. You are strong and even though these might seem like the most heartbreaking times you will prevail. You can't know this now, only when time has passed for you to see. Let yourself grieve and mourn the loss of your soulmate but as you so eloquently said you will see him again in eternity. That thought will get your through. To know that he now longer feels any pain but is in the best place he could possibly be a place where we only hope we can go to one day. My deepest sympathy is with you.

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  32. This makes me so unbelievably sad. My heart is with you and your family.

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  33. I cannot simply imagine what you are going through. Know Martin will live on through your life and your beautiful children's lives. Praying for strength and faith for the whole family.

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  34. I am so very sorry for your loss. May his memory be eternal.

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  35. I am so very sorry for your loss. Sending love, light and prayer that you will walk together again some day. God Bless.

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  36. I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm thinking about you and your beautifull family. My heart goes out to you and your family.

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  37. I'm so sorry Emily. I don't know what to say. I really am so sorry.

    When my mother passed this poem gave me a bit of strength and spoke to me, so I thought I would share it.

    "Do not stand at my grave and weep.
    I am not there; I do not sleep.
    I am a thousand winds that blow.
    I am the diamond glints on snow.
    I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
    I am the gentle autumn rain.
    When you awaken in the morning's hush
    I am the swift uplifting rush
    Of quiet birds in circled flight.
    I am the soft star that shines at night.
    Do not stand at my grave and cry;
    I am not there; I did not die."

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    1. My mother, too, gave me this when I recently lost my best friend. It has been passed down in our family each time a tremendous loss has fallen upon us. So glad to see it here. ((hugs))

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  38. Oh Emily, you are so beautiful and graceful even in the face of such grief. Praying for you always and so glad you will all be together again one day. We grieve with you xxx enjoy your welcoming party in heaven Martin, we'll see you someday. X

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  39. Oh Emily, I can't even imagine. I am glad that you will be able to rest in the Lord and that you have your beautiful little ones as a monument to the love and life the two of you experienced together.
    I am so heartbroken for you and I am praying. So many hugs and love x

    Also, thank you for being transparent with so many personal events in your life to the masses of us who don't know you in person, I really appreciate you.

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  40. Dearest Emily,

    The words do not exist, in any language, that could ever come close to speaking to the depths of your loss. We are praying deeply for the safe travels of Martin's incandescent soul into the starlight that is God's glorious kingdom. We pray for peace and comfort in your heart and truly, truly believe that you will be reunited. It isn't "goodbye", it's "see you later". Watch for Martin in your children's eyes, in their beautiful smiles and innocent laughter, in the shimmer of sunlight dancing in their hair...he's there, always. Tonight, our hearts break beside yours, like waves upon the rocks. We are here for you in the wild tumble. We love you, our dear Freckled Fox, Emily.((Hugs)) All our love, strength, and deepest prayers to you and your little ones and of course, your dearest Marty. @thefreckledfox

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  41. I am so, so, so sorry Sweatheart that Martin passed away - hope he is in a better place now and will take care of you from the above. Be strong knowing you are not alone in this and best for whole family!

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  42. I am so deeply sorry for your loss. Words aren't enough... all my prayers to you and your darling children and all your family.

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  43. Oh Emily, my heart goes out to you. I'm so incredibly sorry for your loss.

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  44. Sending you so much light and love! Isn't it such a beautiful thing knowing our covenants will bless us with an eternal bond. Your experience has taught my to love more deeply and to be more mindful of my present. My heart aches for your loss. I know Martin was such a good man! I'm sure it was a beautiful experience just to spend those years with him. Our savior has him now and he is at peace. I'm hear for you.

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  45. My Emily-as with so many others, you don't know me but I know you. I've come to know your kind and gentle heart, charming personality, and most recently your incredible strength. I've cried with you this past year and can't stop the tears now. My heart is breaking and I can't even imagine your pain. Just yesterday I was praying that you would have just a few more sweet moments with Martin, but he was already gone. There is not another wife on this earth who is more loved than you. I've always admired your beautiful relationship and have been so grateful for the tremendous example you have been and continue to be. I wish I could give you some of my strength this week, to help you in some small way (clean a toilet, mop a floor, fold some laundry).
    You don't know me, but I know you, and you are loved. From one mom of 5 to another. I'll be holding all my loved ones a little tighter today and remember to cherish all the little things.
    Love,
    Anna

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  46. I am following your page for more than 2 years, your love which you and your family is shareing with this world is incredible. Martin was and still will be your angel someone who changes lifes of many people and inspire all of use to better people.May you take comfort in knowing an angel is watching over you.

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  47. There are no words.... only love.

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  48. I can't sleep and I have been reading through your blog for the past few hours. Your husband once wrote this poem

    "Adam named it
    After leaving paradise
    Before the cold took
    The last fruit
    That moment when
    Death is real before you
    And you can handle it
    You can grasp but not hold on
    Put to your mouth but not quite swallow
    And death is beautiful
    It is the culmination of all failure and success
    Until at last all lays
    Ended, Frozen, Sleeping
    Taken beyond all places known
    Vibrant color turned to winter’s white crystal."

    His words are beautiful and they are still here on my computer screen. He is here but not here. He lives on in many ways still. In your children. In your heart and the thousand memories you remember of your time together. Your love story is so beautiful and the love you had for one another was palbable. He is here still Emily, just in another form.

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  49. I'm so sorry, Emily. I have no words to say. If GOD could take my strength and give it to you, let Him. Coz you need it more than I do.

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  50. Dear Emily! You and your family are the true guide through the love , life and death. Stay strong and positive. You've changed the life of many already. Thank you for everything. You stay in my mind and the prayers!

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  51. positively saddened by you and your kids' loss. he will be missed, but never forgotten, as you will see him everyday in their gorgeous faces. X

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  52. I truly am sorry, Emily.
    Thinking of you and your family during this tough time. I hope you find peace in knowing he is relieved of his pain, and will always be looking over you and your little ones. <3

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  53. Emily, my heart is broken for you and your precious babies. I pray that you have the strength and courage to live a full life in Martin's memory xxx

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  54. I have no words to express how sorry I feel for you and your family.
    I wish you all strength that one can possibly have and that you and your children will find comfort in each other.
    Best thoughts coming from Germany.
    Lani

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  55. Emily, I'm really sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you and our kids...

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  56. Emily we met at Alt years ago, and I've watched and prayed for you in the background over here. I can't tell you how my heart aches for you and your sweet children. You are in my prayers and I know God will walk by you as you grieve and experience all the stages of grief.
    Don't ever be afraid to reach out to this community, you are a very loved soul!

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  57. My heart is with you, from Brazil. I eish you all the best. Be strong!

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  58. My heart has been heavy all week since knowing you had brought him home.... I feel like I don't know what to say, being that I'm a complete stranger, but at the same time I feel like I have to and want to say something.... This loss is unimaginable and heartbreaking and I just want you to know I've been praying for you and those sweet babies of yours along with your husband and his family. You are an example to many. Stay strong. Stay real. Stay faithful. Your family is loved.

    Morgan

    P.s. Also... A side note.... I noticed you live in twin falls. I am from eastern Idaho but currently live in burley. weird that you live so close and I didn't realize. I don't want to be a creep but it makes me feel like I want to drive over to twin right now to give you a hug or something... Anyway... My thoughts and prayers are with you.

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  59. I'm just devastated for you and your kids. So, so sorry.

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  60. Oh Emily, he is in a better place now, resting, pain free. I admire your strength throughout this whole ordeal. May God bless you and your precious babies always. You now have your angel Marty watching over all of you. My heart is with you. RIP Martin ❤

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  61. My heart breaks for you and your family. Find comfort that now he is in peace.

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  62. I am so sorry for the loss of your husband and your childrens' daddy. Hugs from a stranger...I pray that you get through this time with peace in your hearts.

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  63. I'm so so sorry Emily. You'll always have him in your heart and in the faces of your children. Be strong. He was and is very loved.

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  64. I am so sorry for your loss Emily. I hope you and your family know that he is finally at peace in Heaven. My God bless you all during this difficult time. Sending you prayers to you and your children.

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  65. My friend I am so sorry for your tragic lose. I will hold my husband a little closer today.I don't know you personally and I can't understand your pain fully but I am praying for you and your babies today. Trust that God is the God id comfort and just as he sees his people in the bible he also sees you in your time of pain. - Molly from MN

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  66. I know that the sadness my own heart feels pales in comparison to what you and your family are experiencing right now. I'm praying for you all to be surrounded and wrapped up in the arms of the Holy Spirit, and that you specifically will feel loved and cared for as you love and care for your littles.

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  67. Oh Emily, I am so so sorry for your loss of Martin. My heart and prayers go out to you and your little ones. A beautiful part of watching them grow up is that you will be able to see Martin in all of them and you have little pieces of him in all of them...my love to you and your children...

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  68. Best wishes from Australia. Words fail me. My deepest sympathies for your loss.

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  69. I'm so sorry. I hope that you see bits of Martin everyday in your beautiful children. Sending love and prayers.

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  70. Emily, I am so very sorry for your unimaginable loss. My prayers are with you and your family.

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  71. Oh Emily, I have no words, only tears to share with you. My heart breaks for you and your precious babies. You have stood vigilant beside your sweetheart. No man could ask for a better wife to love. Your sweetheart has run his race, he has fought the good fight. Please know that you have been and will continue to be in all our thoughts and prayers as you face this grief. I wish this community could physically wrap our arms around your sweet family, but I hope our words convey our love. Sending so much love and support from Texas.

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  72. May God lift you up and sustain you.

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  73. My sweetest Emily, the posting none of us ever wanted to read. I'm sending prayers of strength to you my love 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 hold your little ones tight and I know his memory will live forever 😢 Lana

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  74. Don't think of him is gone away
    His journey has just begun
    Life has so many facets
    This earth was only one

    Just think of him as resting
    From the sorrow and the tears
    In a place of warmth and comfort
    Where there are no days or years

    Think how much he must be thinking
    That you should know today
    That nothing but the sorrow
    Will only pass away

    And think of him as living
    In all the hearts he touched
    For nothing loved is ever lost
    And he was loved so much
    E. Brennan

    This poem brought me a portion of peace during my loss I hope it will do the same for you. I have thought of you all and prayed for you all and will continue to do so in hopes that peace will override all understanding. Martin's spirit left his body and a portion of that energy has been placed in you and your children. When your heart is ready to receive it you will find him all around you. A love like yours can't be erased through earthly separation. Thank you for allowing us the opportunity to see what real love looks like!!!!!!!




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  75. Don't think of him is gone away
    His journey has just begun
    Life has so many facets
    This earth was only one

    Just think of him as resting
    From the sorrow and the tears
    In a place of warmth and comfort
    Where there are no days or years

    Think how much he must be thinking
    That you should know today
    That nothing but the sorrow
    Will only pass away

    And think of him as living
    In all the hearts he touched
    For nothing loved is ever lost
    And he was loved so much
    E. Brennan

    This poem brought me a portion of peace during my loss I hope it will do the same for you. I have thought of you all and prayed for you all and will continue to do so in hopes that peace will override all understanding. Martin's spirit left his body and a portion of that energy has been placed in you and your children. When your heart is ready to receive it you will find him all around you. A love like yours can't be erased through earthly separation. Thank you for allowing us the opportunity to see what real love looks like!!!!!!!




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  76. Don't think of him is gone away
    His journey has just begun
    Life has so many facets
    This earth was only one

    Just think of him as resting
    From the sorrow and the tears
    In a place of warmth and comfort
    Where there are no days or years

    Think how much he must be thinking
    That you should know today
    That nothing but the sorrow
    Will only pass away

    And think of him as living
    In all the hearts he touched
    For nothing loved is ever lost
    And he was loved so much
    E. Brennan

    This poem brought me a portion of peace during my loss I hope it will do the same for you. I have thought of you all and prayed for you all and will continue to do so in hopes that peace will override all understanding. Martin's spirit left his body and a portion of that energy has been placed in you and your children. When your heart is ready to receive it you will find him all around you. A love like yours can't be erased through earthly separation. Thank you for allowing us the opportunity to see what real love looks like!!!!!!!




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  77. "A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling." Psalm 68:5 and "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18 Praying constantly for your sweet family, Emily.

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  78. Sorry for your loss. Your family will continue to be in my prayers.

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  79. I am so very sorry for your loss. I pray that you find peace and comfort in knowing he is healed now.

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  80. I pray you have what you need, whether it be strength, grace, love or patience to get through this time and every day ahead. Much love and prayers from
    Boston.

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  81. Dear Emily,
    As always, your family is on our prayers, and I especially pray for the repose of our husband's soul and your peace. I know some days it will feel like it's taking a long time before you get to see Martin, but for him, eternal time is different, and he will feel like only moments have passed before he last held you. The two of you will be together oh so soon in the eyes of eternal time! And then you truly will be together, forever and ever and all of eternity. All of us wives (and husbands) will all make the same goodbye that you and Martin did...and we have your gracefulness, devotion, and love to look up to. God bless you both and all your baby foxes.

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  82. Oh, dearest Emily. My heart is breaking for you. I'm in tears right now. I follow your blog and read your posts. I have prayed for you and your family. This is truly heartbreaking, but I know you have an incomparable strength and I know you can do this. I'll be thinking of you and your kids.

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  83. I am so very sorry for your loss. Praying for strength and comfort for you and your family.

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  84. I have no words, but know I am praying for you and your beautiful kids. His memory lives on in them. I'm so very sorry.

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  85. Emily, I am so sorry for your loss. I wish I had words to help you or make you feel better, just know you have so many people thinking of you and rooting for you and your family.

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  86. I am so sorry for your family's great loss. God bless and keep you during this terrible time.

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  87. This just crushed my heart. I wish I could just give you a huge hug! Thank you for allowing us to be involved in this painful part of your life! I know God sees the big picture even if we can't fathom it, and I'm sure He has more great things in store for you. XOXOXO

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  88. So very sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family at this sad time.

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  89. Praying for you, and your sweet family. I've been thinking of you all often...

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  90. My heart breaks for you and your sweet family. I'm so sorry for your loss. Sending prayers, thoughts, & hugs.

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  91. Oh how I'm so heartbroken for you but so thankful for the assurance you have of seeing him again one day!! I will be praying for you and your beautiful children!

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  92. I have been praying, praying, praying for your sweet family and will continue to do so for a long time. May you feel God's peace and comfort in the days to come.

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  93. I can't begin to imagine all you're going through. I cried this morning for you and your little ones, and for Martin. I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing this with us, for helping us remember what is truly important in life. I know at times in the race of life, important people are taken for granted, thank you for teaching us all that time is fleeting and we are here for but a moment so we should cherish and love these moments to the fullest, regardless of the outcome. I am thinking of you and your family. Please care for yourself in this hard time. We are all pulling for you, and thankful that Martin is at peace. ox

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  94. Death is nothing at all,
    I have only slipped away
    into the next room.

    I am I,
    and you are you;
    whatever we were to each other,
    that, we still are.

    Call me by my old familiar name,
    speak to me in the easy way
    which you always used,
    put no difference in your tone,
    wear no forced air
    of solemnity or sorrow.

    Laugh as we always laughed
    at the little jokes we shared together.
    Let my name ever be
    the household word that it always was.
    Let it be spoken without effect,
    without the trace of a shadow on it.

    Life means all
    that it ever meant.
    It is the same as it ever was.
    There is unbroken continuity.

    Why should I be out of mind
    because I am out of sight?

    I am waiting for you,
    for an interval,
    somewhere very near,
    just around the corner.

    All is well.


    I hope this brings you comfort. In my thoughts 💜

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  95. I am so, so sorry for your loss and for that of your whole family. Sending thoughts and prayers for you all during this time.

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  96. Emily- I am so sorry for the loss to you and your family. You have shown such grace and strength during this battle. I hope that you find comfort in your faith, love, and family. Best, SCJ

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  97. I'm so so Emily, I've been thinking about you & your family a lot lately, xxx

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  98. So sorry for your loss! Praying for peace and comfort as you all grieve.

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  99. My dear Emily,

    I've been following you for some years and today when I read this my heart stopped, I've been fearing these day so I imagine you. But, in a way he didn't left: there are still five little pieces of him, on your so cute sons, and the best part of him is left in you. So he's still hear, and it will be you all that will make him be alive.

    I just wanted to give you a big hug and to give my strenght for these days...
    Kisses from across the atlantic, Portugal.

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  100. sorry for your loss, stay strong <3

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  101. I am so very sorry for your loss. My heart and prayers go out to you and your children...at least Martin is with the Lord now and experiencing everlasting peace and freedom from pain. I have to wonder if you and I know some of the same people since you live in Twin Falls and I am from there. I know you have a good support system to help you through this. Prayers for your strength and healing, Emily.

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  102. I don't use the word "hate" often, but I hate cancer. You are an example to many of how to love through pain. Your husband was blessed to have you and you will make him proud with your strength to go on. Blessings of peace and incredible power to you.

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  103. Emily, there are no words, except that I am so terribly sorry for your loss.

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  104. I am so sorry for your loss. My son in law has stage 4 melanoma (he was diagnosed when he and my daughters son was 4 weeks old). My thoughts and prayers are with you and your beautiful children.

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  105. My heart breaks for you and your littles. Much love to you and all your family. Martin will be watching over you and the children for all your days.

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  106. Praying for you and your girls. I'm heartbroken for you family! May God and your sweet memories bring you strength and healing during this time.
    Kristin

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  107. What a terrible loss for you and your family! I am so sorry and think and pray for you all often. I cannot imagine what you ate going through, but having been witness to the horrors of cancer and what it does to a loved one, there is so much joy in knowing that they no longer suffer from this horrible disease and they are whole and healthy and happy in a better place than here. And we will see them again! So many prayers to you all...

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  108. So saddened by your loss. I wish you and your family peace.

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  109. Dear Emily, ever since the first time you and Martin met at Eventide I could see the immediate interest you first had in each other. I just knew you would make a darling couple, and you did! What beautiful children and a kind heritage for you to be proud of. I remember what a gentle man and how courteous he always was. So quick to offer assistance or anything if I needed help with anything while directing Eventide. I hope you feel my love for you this day and always. Thinking of you from Japan. Sorry I cant make it to the services as we are on a mission in Japan. I will be thinking of you, sweet lady! Love, Carolee

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  110. Praying for your heart and for your sweet babies. I watched my best friend lose her husband from the same cancer a few years back so your heartache is really hitting home for me. I hope some day you will find the healing she has found until you and Martin can once again be reunited. You will be in my continued prayers.

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  111. Martin and I were very close in high school. My heart breaks for a world without him and for you and those beautiful babies. Your optimism and strength are inspiring. My thoughts are with you and your family.

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  112. I am so, so sorry for you loss. You and your family are in my prayers

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  113. I am so so sorry. May the Lord carry you the days, weeks, and months ahead. Grace to you as you grieve!

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  114. Dear Emily,

    I've been so floored by your strength through this and my heart is aching for you now. Wishing you continued strength, light and peace.

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  115. My prayers are with you and your family, Emily. I'm so sorry for your loss. May the Lord hold you in this very hard time.

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  116. My deepest sympathies. Sending nothing but love, prayers and peace to you and your little ones. <3

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  117. You are a Beautiful person for letting all of us join you on this journey of love, laughter, pain, and tears. We haver all fallen in love with you and your family and I thank you for that. You have show us how to love and be loved in good times and bad thru sickness and health. We are not part of your inner circle but rest assured that Martin will also live on in our hearts as well. I hope you will allow us to continue on as part of your journey so we can cheer for you. The best way out is always through: Robert Frost from A Servant to Servants
    Thank you,
    Susan Harbourt

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  118. I am so very sorry for your loss. I'm glad Martin is out of pain, but so sad you and your children no longer have him to hug.

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  119. Hold those babies tight and find strength in their smiles. He will always be near you- of that I am sure! Families are forever, what a wonderful gift to have that knowledge. Love from Utah!!

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  120. I am heartbroken for you and your entire family. My mother passed from colon cancer when I was 9 years old. I have been there and I know there is nothing I can say to make it better but please know that there are many of us thinking of you today.

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  121. I'm so saddened by the news. I can only hope you find some comfort and the strength you need for your little ones. Remember that the Lord guards you and keeps you. Nahum 1:7 "The Lord is good, a refuge in times of trouble. He cares for those who trust in him"

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  122. Emily, I'm absolutely torn apart for you and your family. I'm so sorry for your loss.

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  123. May God hold and comfort you and give you His hope and peace. Praise God this world is not our home and that His children will spend eternity with in His perfect presence that wipes away all tears, fear and sadness. ~Love to you~Keslie

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  124. My heart breaks for you and your family. Praying for peace and comfort for you all.

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  125. Emily, I'm so sorry for your loss and my prayers continue to go out for you and your family. You have 5 beautiful children and they are half Martin so you will always have a piece of him with you! I'm so sorry you had to go through this so early in life and in your marriage but from all of the wonderful photos you posted of you and your sweetheart it seems you two truly enjoyed a lifetime together and reached a level of love that many people don't ever reach in 100 years. I pray that you continue in this journey that you are on with nothing but strength and courage! Our bodies are temporary but love is eternal and can never ever be destroyed. Hugs and so much love from Finland.

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  126. I am so sorry for your loss. Cancer has claimed far too many wonderful people. I am thinking of you and your 5 beautiful little ones and wishing you all the best. xx Rox-Anne, Celebratingthislife.ca

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  127. I'm so so sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you, and my thoughts are with you xx

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  128. My heart breaks for you. From one widow to another, stay strong and remember the love.

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  129. Emily,

    You and Martin are an inspiration. Your story is and still will be beautiful, and while you and the kids may feel his physical loss profoundly, you can never take away the spirit, love, strength, and guidance he gave to you in his time here. Thank you for sharing your words and your life with us - we can all learn from the beauty of your experiences.

    “Grief is like the ocean; it comes on waves ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm, and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim.”

    <3

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  130. May God bless Martin. And may He give you and your family the strength to move forward from this.

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  131. Many prayers to you and your children during this heartbreaking time

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  132. I am so sorry for your loss. I had the privilege of having Martin as my first district leader on my mission. He will be missed. My prayers are with you and your family.

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  133. I have followed along with your journey through cancer from the beginning, I think this might be the only time I've commented on any of your posts because the words are hard to find. I have prayed for you and Martin and your beautiful children. I am so heartbroken to read this. Your courage and grace have been inspiring. I am so thankful that you have the comfort and security in knowing that this isn't goodbye forever and that you will be reunited with your love again. Know that many are lifting you and your baby foxes up in prayer.

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  134. I just heard about your story from another friend a couple weeks ago. You have been in my thoughts and prayers since then. I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. Even though I don't know you, my heart breaks for you and your family. What a beautiful statement you've written. So eloquently spoken and full of faith and thanks. Sending my love and continued prayers for you and your family.

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  135. Emily, you are so strong. I cannot imagine the pain and hurt you must be feeling. Though I've never met you my heart is with you.

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  136. I just cannot imagine how you feel. I'm so sorry for your tremendous loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you!

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  137. I don't even know what to say, I keep rewriting this. . .I wish you and your family all the best.

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  138. He will be with you to raise and guide your children, even if he's only felt within your heart. I'm so terribly sorry for your loss.

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  139. I'm so sorry for your loss, Emily. My heart is broken for you. Praying for your sweet family.

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  140. Emily, you don't know me, but I served with Martin in Romania. I want you to know that we are all praying for you and your sweet little ones. May God bless you with love and peace.

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  141. You are AMAZING.My heart aches for you and your babies. I pray you find some comfort in the Lord and knowing, one day, you will again be with your love. Your strength and grace through all of this, is just simply inspiring. I will hold my family closer than ever. Thank you for sharing your journey.

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  142. I am so, so sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts.

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  143. I have no words...only tears. So much love and light being sent to your family.

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  144. Many prayers for you and your family. <3

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  145. I I lost my husband to cancer 7 months ago when he was 31. If you ever need someone to talk about things he might understand a little more than most (I'm sure there's some parallels and some differences in our experiences), I am here. My blog is ajmjensen.blogspot.com if you want to get to know my story a little more. So much love and tears for you- you may not feel like Wonder Woman now but you'll slowly become that way ❤️.

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  146. I'm so sorry Emily! You are so strong. So many prayers and love to you and your family.

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  147. I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. Thoughts and prayers for you and your family.

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  148. I am heartbroken for you. Sending love.

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  149. You are AMAZING. How my hearts weeps for your sorrow. Your grace and strength throughout this whole journey has been nothing short of inspirational. I have learned to hug my loves tighter every day and not to take one minute for granted. May you be held tight and close by your loved ones, and find comfort in the Lord during this most difficult time.

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  150. I am so sorry for your lose. You will again my dear see him again.. You amaze me with your strength.. Your in my prayers always.

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  151. Dearest Emily,
    My heart goes out to you and your entire family. I can't seem to find the words to express to you how very sorry I am to hear of your sweet love's passing. I'm here for you whenever, wherever. <3

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  152. Goodbye for now Marty..until we meet again my friend. Thinking of you Em..I wish you the best during this tough time

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  153. It broke my heart to see this on Instagram earlier. I'm so sorry for your loss and I'm praying for you and your family.

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  154. I'm so so sorry for your loss. Paying for you and your children.

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  155. meyers family,
    we are so sorry for your loss. you don't know me or my family but i cried for you and yours. the joy of knowing that through Christ you will be together for all eternity will hopefully bring you guys comfort. it was such a blessing to have all of those beautiful kids to remind you of martins love every day. they are the living proof of the love you shared.
    you are loved Meyers family!

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  156. I can't imagine losing my husband at such a young age. I'm crying for you. I pray Hod gives you peace.

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  157. So deeply sorry for your loss. Sending prayers & hugs to all of you.

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  158. Emily I am so very sorry for the loss of your sweetheart... I pray for you and your family

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  159. Sending thoughts and prayers to your family, Emily. I'm so sorry for your loss. <3

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  160. Oh, no. My heart breaks for you. I've been following your blog from a distance, rooting you and Martin on, praying for you, hoping for you. I am so deeply sorry to hear of his passing.

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  161. I'm so sorry for your loss. My heart grieves with yours. :(

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  162. I am so very sorry for your loss of an incredible husband and father. Sending thoughts of love, peace your way. <3

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  163. There are no words for such a tragedy. My heart breaks for you. I just pray with all my might that God is bringing peace and comfort to your precious heart. You have shared with us strangers much more than most would, and we've grown to genuinely love you through it. So many thoughts, prayers and tears for you, my beautiful friend.

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  164. There are no words for such a tragedy. My heart breaks for you. I just pray with all my might that God is bringing peace and comfort to your precious heart. You have shared with us strangers much more than most would, and we've grown to genuinely love you through it. So many thoughts, prayers and tears for you, my beautiful friend.

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  165. Like many here, I have shared in the adventures of you and your beautiful family for a while, through all the happiness, and now through this tragedy. I am so sorry that you have to endure such heart break. I can't imagine what you're going through. As you grieve, I hope that you find some bit of comfort in all the love that is being sent your way and knowing that your husband will always be with you in spirit and through your five wonderful babies.

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  166. I am so sorry for your loss. It breaks my heart but I know you guys will be together again one day. Hold and kiss your babies and never forget he will alwasy be with you.

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  167. Emily, my heart breaks for you and your children. I pray that you all find peace and comfort through this tragic time.

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  168. Oh Emily- I am so, so sorry.
    I read this today and pray for you and your family. My deepest condolences.

    Wild Geese, by Mary Oliver
    You do not have to be good.
    You do not have to walk on your knees
    For a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
    You only have to let the soft animal of your body
    love what it loves.
    Tell me about your despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
    Meanwhile the world goes on.
    Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
    are moving across the landscapes,
    over the prairies and the deep trees,
    the mountains and the rivers.
    Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
    are heading home again.
    Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
    the world offers itself to your imagination,
    calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting --
    over and over announcing your place
    in the family of things.

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  169. i'm so sorry for your loss. I've been a follower for some time and I'm saddened to see the end of this story. Though when we had to take our son off life support, the minute he stopped breathing, while sad, also gave us all a sense of peace. No more pain, no more worry. He's safe and I'm god's arms now. <3

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  170. Also, right now there is a dark cloud, but I promise you, there will be light again. In his memories and in his spirit always surrounding you. <3 Take time to grieve. There are no rules, just hug your children and lean on your family. It will all be okay. "The best way out is always through". Much love

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  171. So hard for me to read this post. Shedding tears seeing this post. I know we don't know each other, but I can only imagine how it would feel to be in this situation. My heart and prayers are going out to you. God bless you and your sweet children is this hard time. I know God's loving hand is upon you.

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  172. I am so sorry for your loss. There are no words I can share to ease your pain but so many are praying for you. Stay strong!

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  173. I am soo sorry for your loss, Emily. Me and mine will pray for you and yours. *hugs tight*

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  174. I was in tears when I reading this. I'm sending my love and prayers out to you and your family. Because of your beautiful soul and your beautiful story I hug my little ones longer and tighter. (they are both around Lydia and Eleanor's ages - 12 months apart)
    Yesterday I outlined this quote from a book I was reading.
    "After a very short visit to earth the times comes for us to pass from this world to the next... and we leave the world for full communication with God. It is possible for us, like Jesus, to send our spirit of love to our friends and family when we leave them... it is our greatest gift for those we love."
    I am so very- so deeply sorry Emily- I wish I could offer comfort and peace for you.

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  175. Prayers headed up right now for you and your littles and family! <3 So sorry for your loss of your other half. I can not even imagine! You are an amazing mama and will continue to be for those littles.

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  176. Prayers to you and your family. So sorry for you loss. I hope you all got some amazing time with Martin before he left to be with God. Know he is looking down from Heaven and watching you all. My heart is broken for you and your family.

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  177. I've never met either of you, and yet I feel such pain in my heart right now. I am truly sorry for your loss, and pray that you can find peace.

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  178. I am so, so sorry to hear about your incredible loss. I've followed this journey you've been on and have been inspired by your courage and willingness to live every moment to the fullest even through your pain. All the best in the coming days, you are strong and able.

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  179. That's so so so sad. Emily, my heart goes out to you and your family.

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  180. My heart is heavy for your families loss. Too good, Too soon. Stay strong, Emily.Sending all my prayers and positive vibes to you and yours.

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  181. I'm so sorry for your loss. Sending you prayers!

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  182. Feeling your heartbreak with you and sharing in prayers for you and your family. So thankful for the joy and hope you share in eternity.

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  183. My sweetest Emily, again I will holding you and your babies tightly in my thoughts, heart and prayers. Your strength has been truly amazing. You and Martin experienced a love that will last forever.

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  184. I am so very aorry for the loss you and your family are experiencing. My thoughts and prayers will be with you, praying that God will give you the strength you will need.
    God Bless

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  185. I'm just a brand new follower today. I have no words that can be of more comfort than what you know and what has been said, but I will pray for you. My brother died 20 years ago at my age leaving his wife and 3 daughters. His favorite scripture is Isaiah 40:31. It is a comfort to read it on his headstone when we visit his grave. Love to you and your children.

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  186. I cannot begin to imagine the depth of your sorrow at losing your eternal companion in this life. But in these times where we lose our loved ones, I take great solace in knowing that I will see them again an be reunited for time and all eternity in the life to come. I pray that the Lord may bless you an your family at this difficult time, but more specifically that he will bless you with the comfort and strength that you will need to carry forward. My heart goes out to you. You are in my prayers. <3

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  187. Dear Emily, I'm so sorry... I'm keeping you & you're little ones in my prayers.

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  188. Thoughts and prayers are being sent up for you and your sweet babies.

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  189. You and your little ones are in our prayers.

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  190. Your family is in my heart and my prayers. My heart breaks at your loss. I am glad he is at peace.

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  191. I just found you the other day, just before he died. I'm SO very sorry for you and your family. No words can adequately help you, I know. So just know that I'm holding your family close to my heart.
    Brenda

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  192. I just found your story a couple of weeks ago, and you are an amazing woman. I cannot imagine what you are feeling or how hard this would be to go through, and I only have 1 kid, let alone the 5 you and Martin had. Thank you for your beautiful example of strength and the ability to move forward through all of the trials you've been going through. Sending prayers for you and your sweet little family!

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